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My daughter was adopted now wants to come home?

Family Law, Children, Adoption

My daughter was adopted now wants to come home?

Postby lizzi » Sun Sep 11, 2016 5:22 pm

My daughter was adopted in year 2000. No fault of my own and I didn't sign any adoption papers. She is nearly 16 and has recently found me. She is having a really hard time with her adoptive parents and they are very strict with her. At first we was meeting without telling them because she was scared of them finding out so as a mum I didn't say anything. Finally I ended up telling them the truth because I felt it was only fair. At first the adoptive was okay with us meeting each other after we had a meeting. That meeting hasn't been taken I don't know why. The only way I could keep in touch with my daughter was through social media which the adoptive knew about. Not they have banned her from having any contact with me. This has really upset my daughter and she self harms and tells me she wants to live with us (she wanted to live with us from the beginning) now her adoptive parents are making this into a competition and an argument. I want to know what rights will my daughter have now orwhen sshe's 16. Can anyone help as I'm stuck and I'm really concerned about her safety.
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Re: My daughter was adopted now wants to come home?

Postby Boo » Sun Sep 11, 2016 6:13 pm

This could be tricky.
Contact your Local Authority Adoption Agency for advice.
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Re: My daughter was adopted now wants to come home?

Postby 3.14 » Sun Sep 11, 2016 7:07 pm

It is tricky. I think you need to take advice. 16 years of age in one benchmark then there is 18 years of age. At 18, she can do as she pleases. At 16, there may still be things that she can't do.
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Re: My daughter was adopted now wants to come home?

Postby Smouldering Stoat » Sun Sep 11, 2016 7:48 pm

Boo has it right. You need specialist advice, and you need to tread carefully.

You must continue to obey any court orders that have been made about your daughter.
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Re: My daughter was adopted now wants to come home?

Postby Hairyloon » Sun Sep 11, 2016 8:18 pm

Smouldering Stoat wrote:Boo has it right. You need specialist advice, and you need to tread carefully...

And we do not give advice here, specialist or otherwise. We could try to discuss the law on the subject, but it is not my field. All I know is that the court has to try to decide what is best for the child and that they will take the child's wishes into consideration.
I have never been involved in any such cases, but I have observed that they can get quite nasty.
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Re: My daughter was adopted now wants to come home?

Postby Boo » Sun Sep 11, 2016 9:15 pm

Hairyloon wrote:
Smouldering Stoat wrote:Boo has it right. You need specialist advice, and you need to tread carefully...

And we do not give advice here, specialist or otherwise. We could try to discuss the law on the subject


You know the script: Start a new thread.
This is a sensitive issue & lizzi needs to focus without distraction.
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Re: My daughter was adopted now wants to come home?

Postby dls » Tue Sep 13, 2016 5:40 am

Is there any current social services involvement? There may be a clear need to be. Is she still at school?

The OP needs to recollect any related paperwork, and obey any orders made.
It is a question of treading very gently at first. What matters here in law and in practice is the child's safety and best interests and right to self determination. The wishes of any of the adults involved fall a long way behind.

I doubt that an court would wish to restrict renewed contact, particularly as the girl gets older, but these situations are so hugely varied that no universal rule can be laid down.

Please take great care.
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